Although it may be difficult to be taught a lesson when you are shot repeatedly by a plasma gun on high-power and turned into a pile of glowing goo!
Cult members were busy leaving pamphlets advertising their next orgy and bake sale throughout the district. Local Van Saar & Delaque gangs had had enough and decided to dish out some punishment while the local Enforcer precinct sent out a patrol to stop the Cult - the penalty for illegal distribution of saucy pamphlets: death by shotgun.
Some Cult members were slacking off and playing games, in an un-explainable sci-fi genre/real-life crossover.
The 'battle' was over quickly, the unwitting low-level pawns of Chaos completely unaware that they were to be sacrificed on the alter of teaching game mechanics, and had really rubbish stat-lines.
A summary of events:
- The Van Saar gang proved to be utterly lethal. Every shot resulted in a downed cultist, and other than an unlucky early grenade scatter, and seemingly forgetting to charge their las-guns the night before (failing multiple 2+ ammo roles), their plasma-gun toting Champion brazenly romped through the game with his plasma gun on full power. Somehow one cultist with a cutlass got close enough to slice the ear off one ganger, but that was the one blip on a performance that left everyone else worrying if the Van Saar gang and their ridiculously high ballistic skill are destined to be become the most hated gang of the campaign.
- If the Van Saar gang hit with every shot fired, then the opposite can be said of the Enforcer Patrol who missed with an alarming regularity despite firing shotguns at enemies who were often lying on the floor directly in front of them. They also suffered the ignominy of losing a patrolman to a man, in pink and yellow with a pointy hat, armed with a stick:
However the threat of a withdrawal of their grox-donut quota soon spurned them into action, and their stub gun-weilding champion gunned down the stick-armed cultist who was busy defiling the patrolman corpse.
- The Delaque gang faired a little better, managing to finish off a few enemies (helped by one cultist who hilariously blew up his colleague with a wildly inaccurate grenade) and their snippy sneaky rending guy - I've forgotten what they are called but that is what they do! The one blemish was a ganger being blown apart by the Cult Overseer's bolt pistol (he apparently made a full recovery according to the injury table, so there we go!)
Eventually Father Guttenberg was cornered and hit by the full force of - you guessed it - a full power plasma gun hit. But, in the manner of a dodgy early 90s manga cartoon, a horrible Slaaneshi daemon beast emerged from the dying old man's mouth and/or anus.
The foul, but strangely attractively coloured, beast was eventually driven off by repeated lasgun hits and shotgun blasts, but as it ran it collected the Delaque gang's snippy sneaky rending ganger; its destination, the cult's lair, and into what was undoubtedly a very convenient segue into the next campaign mission.
The Delaque ganger being held by the local cult. It may be that he doesn't want to leave.
One cultist hid in a portaloo, waiting for an unsuspecting gang member to walk past or try and use the facilities. But, I forget he was in the there until after the game had finished!